Wow, I'm starting to neglect this blog badly. I had a bad dream last night and I just wanted to record it somewhere. The dream is result of stress from both Helen and Norm's wedding this Saturday and some stress in Patrick and my relationship, in terms of moving things forward (getting married, finding a place to live). The setting is our wedding in a church. It is supposed to be at 1pm. It's a few hours before the wedding and I'm stressing out to my mother about how so many things are still undone. We don't even have rings, and I suspect Patrick neglected to get a marriage license. I thought we should run to Chinatown to buy a couple of plain gold bands or else we would be stuck with some plastic rings from one of thos plastic eggs dispensers and no one will think we are serious. I get dressed in my bridesmaid's gown for Helen's wedding, my hair is done, but by now it is very late (8pm) and all the guests are really bored and I'm thinking that they are not going to the Chinese banquet which will last until at least 11pm. We get married, but I'm not sure that I am fully into it because I'm worried that we might get divorced in the future, but then since we don't have a license or the rings, is it a valid marriage? And did Patrick neglect these things on purpose because he isn't fully committed either? Somehow we got a second chance to get married, to start the day over. This time, I was ready, roughly on time, but no one else showed up because they all thought I was going to be late. Justin showed up and I asked why he was so late and where everyone else was and he said that I was going to be late because I always am. I was mad because I wasn't late this time. I think either Evana and Soon or Helen were the attendants. Then when we were up at the altar, suddenly, I was in plain clothes because I hadn't had time to change and I was really embarrassed. Overall, just a really hectic kinda day where nothing went right.